Wal-Mart Matchmaking
Are you single? If you're not single, allow me to share with you one of the secrets of Single Life. If you are, in fact, single, perhaps you can back me up.
As a single person, my days are (fairly) simple.
- Go to work
- Go home
- Workout
- Shower
- Water the flowers
- Eat dinner
- Watch TV
- Go to bed
Because I do not live in the immediate vicinity of my friends, it's rare that I see anybody during the week. This means that Friday and/or Saturday evenings are in some way friend-oriented. Maybe it's dinner. Maybe it's hanging out at somebody's apartment or house. Maybe it's a trip to the ranch. The point: there's some sort of activity.
But sometimes, plans don't come together which leaves singletons alone on a weekend night. I, for one, am a homebody, so this doesn't bother me terribly. Before KSCS up and cancelled Classic Country Saturday night, I preferred to be home on Saturday nights. Nevertheless – I don't always want to be home all evening all by myself.
Enter Wal-Mart.
Wal-Mart in the Mid-Cities on a weekend afternoon is miserable. It's overly-crowded, noisy and under-stocked. On a Friday or Saturday night, however – it's blissful. You can easily get whatever it is that you're looking for because the shelves are full. You don't have to grab and go to avoid being run over by a frazzled mother trying to grab the last few items before her toddler has a meltdown. If you wanted to (gasp!) stop and read a box to see if that product is actually something you want to buy? You totally can! Mid-day? Toss it in your cart, and return it if you don't like it. It's just easier that way.
However, I'm sure you'll notice if you're doing your Wal-Mart shopping on a Friday or Saturday night that the clientele is far different than the mid-day crowd. Everyone is single. Everyone is pushing almost-empty baskets with staple items: shampoo, soap, beer, toilet paper, cereal, soy milk (it stays good so much longer than regular milk!) and a pack of cookies. The plan of action is simple: get in, get out, go home.
While I was strolling through this past Saturday, this now-familiar scenario got me thinking. Wal-Mart could easily start a dating service. They've already got their target audience in the store, and I'd think that's half the battle. Bonus: you can learn a lot about someone by what's in their cart. Shop and talk. It's like a blind date, but you know – not. Something about tossing a box of pop tarts into your basket really seems to take the pressure out of, "So what do you do for a living?"
Comments
hmmm... you might actually be on to something in a very strange way. Automatically i started thinking that Target might offer a "higher caliber" individual. Unless you're looking to score that night... then Wal-Mart is definitely the way to go. Who knows, they might even pay you for this idea???
-M
Hmm...might not be a bad thing. I hate going to Wal Mart, but I have never been on a Saturday night. Maybe the single girls here in Austin are all there! I should probably have a questionairre prepared though:
1. Do you have all of your teeth?
2. Are you unmarried, never previously married, and have no children?
3. Is your home or apartment firmly anchored to the ground and made of something other than metal?
4. Are you free of methamphetamine addiction?
5. If you answered yes to all 4 of the above, let's take the beer and cookies you have in your cart there and make something happen!
I feel the need to clarify that Wal-Mart in the mid-cities is in no way similar to Wal-Mart, say, on Beach Street. Though I REALLY like Matt's survey, I'd venture to say that 99% of the folks at my Wal-Mart have their teeth, an abode firmly anchored to the ground, and while I can't confirm that they don't have a methamphetamine addiction -- I'd venture to say they don't. Though this Wal-Mart versus Target clientele issue that Marcos brought up -- that is an interesting spin on things, too... :o)
Maybe we can just turn your blog into a dating site. ;o)
Very interesting ... stories of meeting someone at the grocery store actually go way back. The problem is basically what Matt said ... you can meet people in the grocery store really easily but if they're not someone you'd want to meet it doesn't actually help. So: knowing which grocery store (or Walmart) to frequent is big.